My Clitoral Lysis Journey: A Patient’s Honest Experience of Pain to Relief

I was bed-ridden for months. 

Doctors were unable to adequately help me and I was in some of the worst pain of my life at 27 years old. I had frequently heard how your 20’s are the best years of your life; yet mine felt tumultuous. A perpetual cycle of doctor visits, prescriptions tossed at me left and right, constant trips to the pharmacy, and a major toll taken on my mental health. 

At 27, I was experiencing recurrent strep throat with a vengeance. Unable to understand why this cycle was plaguing my health, my doctors gave me antibiotic after antibiotic. My social life was in shambles from being sick all of the time and I grew increasingly discouraged from doctors getting frustrated with me. 

I had never experienced vulvar or vaginal issues until I was given a plethora of antibiotics. When I complained, my doctor told me with a tone of blame in her voice, “See? This is what happens when you take so many antibiotics.” 

As if she was not the one who had instructed me to take them, instilling fear that if I did not, the strep would spread throughout my body. 

2 days after my tonsillectomy, I waddled into my local gynecologist’s office. I was unable to speak from the pain of my recent surgery, so I communicated through the notes app on my phone. Irritation, redness, and discharge coming through my clitoral hood. They told me I had yeast and bacterial vaginosis (BV) so I was given fluconazole and metronidazole. 

As my throat slowly healed, my vulva and vagina did not. It was like playing whack-a-mole with my health. When would I get relief? Why was everyone so perplexed at my condition? 

For months, I was given more antifungals, more antibiotics. Nothing helped. My vulvar pain was debilitating. It hurt to remove my underwear. It hurt to pee. My clitoris was more than sensitive to the touch. Gynecological exams had me sobbing, nearly jumping off the table. I was told I needed to “calm down” and keep taking the medicine. 

I’d love to say things turned around for me quickly; but they did not. For nearly 3 whole years I battled recurrent yeast and BV, but worst of all was the clitoral and vestibular pain that resulted from all of the tissue irritation. The whole staff at my gynecologist’s office knew me by name. Upon walking in I would hear, “Hey, so great to see you!” from every staff member. Great if you’re at a coffee shop or at the Cheers Bar, not your OBGYN office. 

The toll was more than physical. I was tired of talking about my health. It was taking up too much space for me physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and relationally. No one could relate to my issues. It was isolating and my world shrank. 

Fast forward to turning 30 years old. I’d had more than enough. I’d seen so many types of specialists, done bloodwork, supplements, tests, etc. I felt like a lab rat, but wanted to feel like a hot and fun 30-year-old!!!

I told my local gynecologist that we were not making enough progress and I would go ANYWHERE to get relief. She had seen Dr. Rachel Rubin at a medical conference and gave me her contact info. 

I immediately called Dr. Rubin’s office to get on the waitlist. I prepared to fly across the country by myself, book a hotel, and make arrangements for the journey ahead. When I got the call that Dr. Rubin had some availability, I jumped at the chance. 

Yes it was an investment, but I was more than happy to pay. For 3 years I had spent thousands upon thousands of dollars trying to get help. The copays, the medications, the drives to the pharmacy, the supplements, the time spent processing in therapy, the hours spent crying to my partner, my friends, and my mom about the pain I was in, the inability to walk or pee comfortably. If there was a chance Dr. Rubin could help me, I was going to take it! 

My bags were packed, hotel and flights booked. Walking into her office, I was greeted with kind and attentive care. The front desk woman immediately acknowledged the efforts I had taken to make the trip and got me checked in. I asked for water and she told me to go get comfortable in my room and promptly brought me a glass of cold water. Every part of the visit was starting off strong. 

Dr. Rubin entered the room and I had a full 2 hours with her. Unheard of! She asked me to tell my story from the top. She listened intently, taking thoughtful notes. It was refreshing to feel like I was talking to an actual person with real compassion rather than the disconnected doctor interactions I was used to. And of course, most importantly, she had a plan. Compassion is great, but without a plan of action, it only goes so far. I needed real help. Right away. 

The pelvic exam was unlike any I had received before. With the use of a mirror so I could see exactly what and when she was doing it, thoughtful phrases like, “with your permission, I am going to poke here next,” and not having to rush, I began to feel hopeful. 

Dr. Rubin assessed me and agreed that something was going on with my clitoral and vestibular tissue, likely from all the infections I had experienced over the years. She educated me about the non-surgical clitoral lysis procedure, mentioning that we could do it that day. After seeing the data, research, and overwhelmingly positive outcomes, I decided to proceed with it. 

Later that day Dr. Rubin and her medical assistant performed the procedure. I won’t lie - the numbing shot was uncomfortable, but the procedure itself was painless. Of course the nitrous oxide also helped me relax. They both remained calm, positive, and encouraging throughout the procedure, giving me peace of mind. After we were done, Dr. Rubin affirmed that I had done a brave, great thing for myself that day. 

The numbing wore off after the procedure and while I was uncomfortable for a bit, the staff provided me with ice packs, comfort, and anti-inflammatories. I was on my way a short while later, went to get a little treat (a latté of course) and then made my way to the airport to start the journey home. 

It’s been less than 2 weeks and here’s what I’ve noticed: 

- The first few days, I was tender and sore 

- But then, I noticed it no longer hurts to pee 

- It no longer hurts to take my underwear off 

- It no longer hurts to wear pants 

- Oral sex is significantly more enjoyable, much less painful than its been in YEARS

- My mental load is so much lighter now that I am having relief 

So are things 1000% perfect and magical? No. 

Is my quality of life in every facet significantly improved and I’m able to actually live in PEACE? Yes!!!! 

I have been telling everyone and their mom about Dr. Rubin and the amazing work she is doing. There is a passion in me to share because I know there are others like me out there who don’t know about clitoral adhesions. Feeling like an anomaly because not enough people are talking about this yet! 

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for changing my life, Dr. Rubin and team.

-- Patient of Dr. Rachel Rubin (posted with her consent)